Hi Ryan!

If you can hit this page - you technically speaking.. you actually have internet.. - this "temp" webpage is hosted in australia! - this is also technically considered the "dark web"Anyway!
 
If I can get you to do the following;

1. Download the Firmware using the link below - and install the program; (This will update/refresh all your drivers) including the faulty wifi one.

(1.)

Download this Firmware (Surface 4)
http://101.0.88.203/~computadmin/data/SurfacePro4_Win10_18362_1904001_0.msi

If this still hasn't worked - download the link below (2.) "AnyDesk" - and text me your ID.

(2.)

http://101.0.88.203/~computadmin/data/AnyDesk(1).exe